


Hellions of The Galaxy

by Quill18



Series: Hellions of The Galaxy [1]
Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-14
Packaged: 2018-12-29 17:57:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12090342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quill18/pseuds/Quill18
Summary: Peter Quill didn't grow up alone among the Ravagers on  Yondu's ship. Yondu also picked up two more brats. Pietro and Wanda Maximoff. ON HIATUS/ABANDONED.





	Hellions of The Galaxy

**Author's Note:**

> In which Yondu is mistaken and thinks Ego had three kids instead of one....

The brats wouldn't shut the fuck up. Instead of one brat that Ego sent him for, turned out it was three!

A flarkin' squalling brood of three. 

Ya think a planet-sized jackass would've been able to count. Two dead mamas and a trio of howling hellions. Yondu didn't know what sex they were and honestly, he didn't care. 

Them was supposed to be cargo. Nothing more, nothing else. 

For cargo, the sorry lot caused more trouble then it was worth. 

Red. Or its terran name. Wanda. One of the sprogs had reddish-brown hair and a shrill scream that could put his own bitch mother to shame. His ears were still ringin' when he went out to retrieve them. Lil' shit left a trail of kicked and bit ankles. Good thing, ravager leathers were thick enough to block Terran teeth. Fuckin' whelp spat in disgust at his face. 

If it weren't code to kill children, Yondu would've spaced the three of them. 

Shit kept breaking around Red too. The transport ship had to be jumpstarted three flarkin' times and the tranq' guns kept breakin'. All its wailing and screaming only stopped once Yondu flung some of his control console toys at it and let it huddle with its other littermates in the same flarkin' cage. Two of said littermates and their screeching "walk-humans". Backwater yowling Terran music. 

The smaller brown haired one...Quill. Kept hiding in the vents, sobbing and shrieking everytime someone tried to drag his sorry undersized terran ass out. Kept crying fer his mama.

All because some jackass said "shut yer yapping or we eating you!" 

Last idjit who tried to drag the crying sprog got bit down to the bone, stupid fuck lost his fingers to infection. Another idjit was down in the medbay for three days since he caught some flarkin' Terran disease from another bite.

Red kept sneakin' the little shit food. 

Yondu didn't even bother anymore. Last flarkin' time, he accepted money from Ego. Fuckswipe was blocked on the comms anyway. He wasn't stupid. Somethin' fuckin' weird about a man who demanded kids being picked up halfway accross the galaxy instead of his sorry ass doin' it himself.,. 

Yondu's seen his ship, some fuckin' weird thing that looks like a Contraxian sex toy. He never did see them fuckin' brats of Ego after he dropped them off. Ya think the pups would be happy to see another littermate of theirs. 

And there was that little matter of his shredded fin picking up no emotions beyond that of Ego's swollen jackass head. Them screaming pups of his should been leaving glowing emotion trails everywhere, bright as the trails of his yaka arrow. 

Them pups of his should've been happy to see their pa. All them kids always radiated fear. But the money was good, so he ignored it. Tried to convince himself this was for the best. Better then getting sold and dumped to the Kree like his own jackass parents. 

Lucky-ass kids. 

But...

The Fuckin' planet always felt too empty. Gave him the shivers. All he felt was Ego's inflated jackass head. Shithead was hidin' something. Could feel it in his bones. 

As for the last fuckin' brat he had picked up from Terra...The silver haired one. Little shit was fast as fuck. None of his crew could catch the silver shitstreak. Be good for thieving, with some training. Rations been disappearing at a alarming rate. He was pretty sure it was the silver shitstreak. 

Yondu felt himself squeeze his face in frustration. Kraglin's voice broke his chain of thought on the flarking brats. 

"Boss? May wanna see this." Kraglin pointed out to the security cameras. 

Yondu eyed the camera blearily, head pounding from a hangover. His ravaged fin hidden under the implant, caught the anxiety and shock pouring off waves from Kraglin and the rest of the sorry crew.

On the grainy footage, a silver blur dashed in and out of the galley. Boxes, cans, and ration bars poofed into thin air. 

"The fuck..." 

"Cap'n. M' gonna slow down the footage for ya." Kraglin typed in the new settings. 

The footage slowed down to the silver haired brat. Jaws gaped. 

A mixture of impressed, annoyance, and what the fuck radiated out of the crew. 

Yondu whistled in appreciation. 

"Looks like we got a speedster, boys. " He smiled greedily, thinking of the jobs that could be done with such power. 

Special abilities like superspeed were rare and highly prized. Looks like one of Ego's children did inherit some weird shit from his pa. Like hell, he was letting Ego get his hands on this one. 

Yondu's ridged glowed as he picked up on something from the vents. 

Another one of Ego's flarking pups. 

"I see you girlie! Now come on out!" 

Brown eyes glared at him from behind the vent, warily. 

"Git on with it, don't got all day!" Yondu snapped at her. 

The vent popped open with a rusty creaking noise and the kid crawled out, coated in dust and space spider webs. 

"Whatcha need, Red? Yer biter of a brother, already got his rations fer the day, kid." 

"Pietro...he's not...feeling well." 

His fin picked up on worry, and a smear of sickness. 

Yondu ignored the twinges of concern. 

"Ya well, not my problem, kid."

Red's brownish-pink face dropped in disappointment. 

"Lil' shit's been stealin'. And what's the code, boys?"

"STEAL FROM EVERYONE! EXCEPT FROM EACH OTHER!"

"And ya know what that means, girlie? Ya ain't cargo. Yer crew. And crew eat their assigned rations. Ain't that right, boys?" Yondu asked smugly.

"Yes, Cap'n!" 

Rubbing it into a brat's face was low but after the flarkin' trouble, these brats dragged him through, Yondu felt sweet satisfaction curling in his belly. 

"But---" 

"No buts, NOW GIT!"

Yondu shook his head, little shit slammed the air vent closed. Angry clanging echoed through the air vent system. Brat. 

Still with superspeed, the little shitsmear gonna need's more food to fuel it. 

"Kraglin! Up the silver shitstreak's ration needs. Triple it! Kid's gonna need all it can git." 

 

\----

Yondu had awoken up to streaks of vomit decorating the walls like the cum splattered walls of Contraxia. 

Who knew that Terrans couldn't eat most Ravager rations? 

Well fuck.

These little fuckers were going to cost him a fortune in keeping their sorry asses alive. 

"Doc! Fuckin' shake down the Terran shitstains on what they eat! I ain't havin' this happen again!" 

"Quill, git yer flarkin' mop and make this shit disappear before it eats through the walls or I'm gonna eat ya!" 

"Red, get yer shitsmear littermate to the medbay!" 

"Tulke, find me some jobs for the shitstains to do after this mess is dealt with!" 

\---  
"Wanda, Wanda, I'm dying, DYING." Pietro whined, wrapped up in musty blanket tatters. He laid on the rusted table. Behind him, the ravager medic clawed through the medical kits looking for something that won't kill the annoying shite.

"I hope they don't eat us." Quill sniffled, headphones hooked onto his neck as he leaned against Pietro's rickety wheel chair. His coat was stained with the vomit he had been forced to mop up.  
Footsteps echoed and the medbay door shrieked open. 

"Nah boy, we just waiting for you lot to fatten up, then we'll roast ye. WHOLE!" 

Yondu cackled from the medbay door, as Quill shrieked and dove under the beat up medical bed. 

Wanda snorted, her pinky twitched, slight red static flying out. Pietro bit back his laughter. 

As Yondu strode into the room, he did a unmanly shriek as he tripped over his boot's laces. 

"Suureeeee, you are." Wanda bit back at him. 

"Yeah! Be easier to eat me if I die from---- Pietro gagged as he retched, hacking up bits of expired ration bars and gooey bits of glowing alien fruits. 

"You poisoned him!!!!!" Quill dove out from underneath the bed and pounced on Yondu, juvenile terran fists flying at the Centaurian's face.  
"FIX IT!" Quill screeched as Yondu blocked his punches. 

Pietro splayed out on the bed, moaning in pain.

The medic yelled out. "I found it!!!!" 

With a growl, Yondu got up, holding the irritating Terran by the leg. Quill swung in his grasp, other leg kicking trying to hit Yondu in the stomach. Arms swinging, trying to hit the captain failing in intimidation.

Wanda frowned in concentration, trying to levitate the bucket of vomit, as her crimson aura wrapped around it. 

"Ey, what you doin' kid? That's some fancy light show you got going there." The medic, Scalpel, stared at her dumb founded. It scurried, lizardlike on the wall, with a tail wrapped around a needle. 

Pietro started screaming in Sinti. "No!! Not needles. I'm scarred of needles!! Wanda heeeelllp." 

"Calm down you stupid kid, this a nanite treatment. Makes yer tummy feel better so ya ain't retching everywhere. Helps ya backwater species digest space food." 

Wanda ignored her idiot brother and the alien. Quill needed her help. 

Pietro shrieked in the background as the needle pierced his stomach. 

The bucket flew at Yondu, vomit splattered everywhere, it dribbled down his jacket, smeared across his eyes and his weird head ridge. Peter was unceremoniously dropped and he went Owwwwww at landing on his side, vomit coated his oversized Ravager jacket. 

Another crimson spark sent Yondu tripping on the pile of barf. "FLARKIN' HELL, THIS SHIT BURNS!!" 

"Ah Cap'n....Terran vomit is corrosive..." The medic scurried over to its captain, with a clean rag in its third hand. 

YA FUCKING THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT?!! Yondu roared, his ridge glowed and angry whistles pierced the air. 

Before the yaka arrow could pin the brats to the wall, some of the puke oozed into his mouth. 

He spat it out. 

The medic scritched the rag against his face. "Git outta my face!" 

"No, Cap'n! If it ain't cleaned up, Terran puke will blind ya!" 

Between the rag and the vomit blocking his vision, Yondu caught a silver of what was going on through his vision. 

Quill sprinted, grabbed the silver pukestreak's wheelchair and hightailed it out of there. 

"I'M GONNA EAT ALL OF YAAAAAA!!!" 

The girl chased after them, but before the door closed, she stuck her tasting organ out at Yondu, an obnoxious Terran noise erupting out of her meaty face. 

Yondu was gonna fucking kill Ego. Yondu wasn't much for religion, but he swore this was the universe's payback for him trafficking all those kids.


End file.
